Story of the Week

MY GOLF & BOWLING EXPERIENCES

 

    The subject of this week’s feature story is a very obscure athlete; me. When I was young (that was shortly after the turn of the century; I just don’t remember which one), I was a good athlete. That’s the good news.

    Now for the bad news. I’ve never golfed or bowled much. This story is about those "recreations" and a couple of events I’m going to share with you.

 

    When I’m on a golf course, about twice a year, and ‘fore’ is heard, be assured it’s me. It’s a warning for other players to duck, and quickly. Duck from what? Duck from errant balls I’ve hit. Duck from falling tree branches my drives have clobbered. Duck from falling ducks my drives have clobbered. OK, I’m no Gary Player. (I had the pleasure of meeting him at the U.S. Open in 1965; he’s an absolutely terrific person.)

    But I can honestly state here and now that I once had a hole-in-one. It happened at Pier 66 in Fort Lauderdale, Fla. in 1973. It was probably no more than 140 yards, par three, but a hole-in-one nonetheless. A hole-in-one for me is like pulling a royal flush. But I did it. As lousy a golfer as I am, no one can ever take that hole-in-one away from me.

 

    I haven’t been bowling for almost 10 years. I bowl about every 10 years, so I guess I’m due again soon. The last time I went bowling, I rented a ball and shoes at the bowling alley.

    First game, I bowled my usual 140. Second game, I bowled my usual 140. Third game, I bowled 206. I had never come remotely close to that before, but I bowled 206.

    I loved it. I decided that I wanted that old, very used, rented bowling ball. The bowling alley owner told me that I should be fitted for a new one, but I made it clear to him that I wanted that one, and that I’d pay any reasonable price for it. We agreed to the price, and he agreed to have my favorite number, 42, affixed to it. I knew I would become a great bowler.

    I bought a bowling bag, bowling shoes, a bowling towel. I was ready. I couldn’t wait. The following weekend, I went to that same bowling alley. I bowled 136 my first game, and averaged 137 for the night. I was my usual terrible self again.

    As I type this column, I can see the bowling bag in the corner of my office; the bag contains my bowling ball, my bowling shoes, my bowling towel. I haven’t touched it in 10 years. I’ll take any reasonable price for all of it.

 

    As Paul Harvey would say, now you know the rest of the story.

 

Last Week’s Trivia

    A member of the Baseball Hall of Fame batted exactly once in the major leagues and struck out. Who was he? Future great Dodgers’ manager, Walter Alston, as a player for the St. Louis Cardinals in 1936.

 

Trivia Question of the Week

    John Wooden is only one of two individuals enshrined in the Basketball Hall of Fame as both a player and a coach. Who is the other one? See next week’s Sports Junkie for the answer.